Do you sometimes recoil from uncomfortable emotions, thinking that you either shouldn’t be feeling them or that you cannot handle them? The truth is that we’re meant to have a broad range of emotions. We actually need to, since they provide us with valuable information. The key lies in not judging our feelings but becoming […]

There is something treacherous and insidious about procrastination. While it feels good in the short run, in that we are spared (for the present) the possible discomfort involved in pushing ourselves a bit, in the long run procrastination can lead to a type of soul sickness. We begin to doubt (and then more so as […]

Wouldn’t it be a relief if you could finally get – and keep – your life in order? If you were always in tip-top condition physically, without any medical concerns? If you could hit your “ideal” weight and maintain this with an unbroken string of healthy yet delicious meals? If you never fought with your […]

“Always move toward your demons. They take their power from your retreat.” (Thom Rutledge) How does fear show up in your life? Is it that dread of facing the day that causes you to hit the snooze button when your alarm goes off in the morning? Does fear lead you to doubt your abilities and […]

Most of us feel better when we have some degree of control over our lives. After all, feeling on top of things gives us a sense of security and competence. Learning a new skill can increase our self-confidence. Acing an interview and getting the job for which we were vying boosts our morale. Figuring out […]

What constitutes trauma or adversity? Essentially anything that causes physical or psychological pain or injury. This includes personal illness or injury, witnessing the same in someone else, natural disasters, enduring abuse, the death of someone close to us, job loss, addiction, financial problems, relationship difficulties, and incarceration. The range and magnitude of trauma is vast. […]

It’s been said that we are human beings, not human doings. Reminding ourselves of this concept can help us to keep things in perspective. Busyness can masquerade as “getting things done”, which may temporarily bolster our self-esteem, at least on the surface. However, putting excessive focus on staying occupied can alienate us from ourselves as […]

Anger, sadness, fear, and other “negative” emotions have often been given a bad rap. Given that such feelings are generally unpleasant to experience, our aversion to them is understandable. Also, our society encourages us to be positive and optimistic, which is helpful – to a point. The truth is that nobody is happy all of […]

Does it ever seem as if there’s an internal debate going on in your mind? One voice says, “This report which I’ve prepared for my boss sucks”, while another voice tells you that “It’s fine – never mind the typos and grammatical errors”, and a third voice chimes in, saying “Why don’t I take a short […]

Many people in recovery from alcohol or drug abuse, compulsive overeating, gambling, or other addictive behaviors eventually realize that while quitting the behavior is crucial, it’s not sufficient to live a happy, serene, healthy, and useful life. The next step in recovery is emotional sobriety, or learning to deal with the uncomfortable feelings, thoughts, and […]