If there’s one skill we all need in this unpredictable world, it’s resilience. Try as we might, and however hard we work, life will not always go our way. Some people respond to challenges and setbacks by bouncing back even higher, like a superball. Other people are more likely to land like a lead weight. […]

Do you often say to yourself things like, “This experience means that I’m not a good person”, “I’m not good at math”, or “I’m not worthy of my husband [or wife]”. If so, this is a clue that you may have a fixed mindset, in which you see things fatalistically, as if certain qualities of […]

Personal change and growth are healthy and in fact optimal approaches to life. We may fall into the alternatives of stagnation and regression from time to time, but to engage in these patterns on a regular basis isn’t likely to do ourselves or other people any favors. So, how do we get ourselves off auto-pilot […]

“How dare she do such a thing?” “I’ll never get over this!”  “I want him to pay for his actions!” “I’ll never be able to trust him/her/anyone again.” When we’ve been hurt by someone, any or all of these thoughts can plague us. We’re filled with (and tormented by) anger, resentment, tension, anguish, anxiety, and […]

Whether or not you set resolutions for the New Year, you probably would like to maintain or increase your happiness quotient. If so, the following tips may prove to be helpful: Write down three positive things that happened to you each day and think about how and why they occurred. Maybe they seemed to happen […]

Life is precarious, people aren’t perfect, and so it’s inevitable that at some point we’ll be hurt or injured emotionally by somebody’s words or actions. The offense may be something relatively mild (making a thoughtless remark) or horrendous (child abuse). The question is how do we heal? Should we forgive, and if so, why? And […]

“If you believe that feeling bad or worrying long enough will change some past or future event, then you are residing on another planet with a different reality system.”  William James In his book Learned Optimism, Dr. Martin Seligman explains, “The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad events will last a long […]